Lena in the strange takeaway

Lena (Lena Meyer-Landrut) “Taken By A Stranger” @ Eurovision Song Contest 2011

Lena was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister on the sun lounger, and of having nothing to do: once or twice she took the towels away and left them on the side of the pool – but on the third day set fire to them.

The story emerged as part of the largest ever release of UFO files. The extraterrestrial files reveal how the phenomenon was discussed at the highest level of government and security services worldwide, including at the United Nations (UN), the US Central Intelligence Agency (CIA), and was even the subject of a contest in the Dorf of Düssel. The previously-classified records show that in May 2011 the House of Lords held a debate on the subject of disappearing beach towels, the only full debate on the towel wars ever held in British Parliament.

Sir Eric eventually said he too found it “really tiresome” on holiday to be sent out by his wife early in the morning to place beach towels on the desired poolside loungers, but continued his campaign for a full UN debate on beach towels – calling on the UN General Assembly to make 2011 “the year of the sun lounger taken by a stranger.”

The joke was only discovered after bomb disposal experts opened up the book her sister was reading, but it had no graphic content in it, ‘and what is the use of a book,’ thought Lena ‘without graphic content?’ So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could, for the hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether the pleasure of making out in the daisies would be worth the trouble of getting picked up, when suddenly Grenada president, Sir Eric Gairy, with pink eyes ran close by her. There was nothing so very remarkable in that; nor did Lena think it so very much out of the way to hear Sir Eric say to himself, ‘Oh dear! Oh dear! I shall come early!’